-“Doctor…I started moaning like Meg Ryan—just wanted to get him off me.”
Alexandra X. is a young married secretary with two children that confided me one of the least discussed and more camouflaged issues in any medical practice. Except in the special setting of psychiatric or community health practices, patients don’t talk about it and physicians don’t ask.Once in a blue moon the touchy subject of lack of satisfaction in the bed comes to the fore, revealing the extent of women’s emotional frustration.
Gary Brewer of the University of Central Lancashire and Colin Hendric of the University of Leeds developed a questionnaire for women ranging from 18 to 48 olds where they divided female responses to sex into three groups:
- Instructional commands
The investigators found that women used their vocalizations, not to express real sexual pleasure, but to incite their partners’ ejaculation due to boredom, fatigue, discomfort and time constraints due to the social or family agendas. Almost 92% of them felt that these vocalizations boosted manly self-esteem.
Scientists from Yale University and Cincinnati Children’s Hospital proposed that the female orgasm used to be primordial to induce ovulation in our ancestors as it promoted the discharge of prolactin and oxytocin hormones. This reproductive reflex became superfluous in later human generations due to social and cultural conditioning, relieving it of its reproductive function. As a result scientists have proposed that the clitoris started to migrate backwards, radically reducing its sensory stimuli during the coital penetration. What’s a lady to do? If she wants to avoid the banishment of her Eros-spirit to the sombre and barren outer confines of Dildoland, she might have to take a “hands-on” approach.
Long, long time ago (before I became a monk of Medicine) a sexy lady “d’une certaine âge” asked me, panting, to correspond her sublime oral entreaties with “you know what.” As I was maladroitly pursuing the elusive target of the only fully dedicated sex organ in the human species, she pulled me out of the theatre of operations and scolded me:
-“Stop it! You’re firing blindly.Must learn what to aim for first… Go get that hand mirror on the commode.”
She lectured me about the details of her external anatomy. I watched. I listened. I touched. I practiced.
What do you want me to say? When you’re a rookie, a little “tough love” from a seasoned drill instructor can make a big difference in a career…
What do you think? Please tell us.
Don’t leave me alone.