-“Doctor…Another Valentine’s day has passed by—and I’m still single.”
Veronica X. is an attractive young pharmaceutical representative that was sharing her frustration at not having found “the right one” in my office. Even in our “liberated” age where women pride themselves in being able to live and develop their full potential without the company and help of men, most women crave for the exhilarating experience of sharing their lives with one.
After watching women of all ages in that romanticized waiting period, I have identified six major feminine attitudes to manage their stress and anxiety:
- The hopeless romantic
- The busy scavenger
- The event-hopper
- The perpetual denier
- The married reader
- The detached activist
The hopeless romantic. In our times of gender equality and social disregard for the elemental tenets of etiquette and courtship, this lady is expecting a man to conform to the parameters of “the ideal” they carry in their minds. Obsessed with the pursuit of that model, she ignores the more pedestrian but still worthy individuals that are roaming around her, sending her signals.
The busy scavenger. The tremendous expansion of the social media has provided individuals with the possibility of non-stop hunting of potential mates. This lady joins a few selective dating services and checks the suitors. She checks all the updated profiles in Tinder and Facebook for her targets. The connected huntress usually has too many possibilities and little results.
The event-hopper. An attractive lady usually gets invitations to many social events, private parties, inaugurations, expositions, etc., for which she can spend the whole week-end checking the scenery and having a good time. After so much exposure, a good prospect might appear in her field of vision. But once she finds him she is faced with a conundrum: slow down to try to make the relationship work or continue her dizzyingly entertaining quest.
The perpetual denier. As the social attention focus on a romantic event like Saint Valentine’s day, some women turn their attention elsewhere as they are supposedly not interested in those frivolous, consumerist dates. They openly profess not to be interested in finding a romantic partner and prefer the company of girlfriends or interesting people for a conversation. When nobody is around, she peeks at her horoscope to check her chances.
The married reader. Who says that if you’re married you shouldn’t check around? There are countless women that find themselves hopelessly trapped in a loveless marriage and find an escapist solace in reading romantic novels. This lady has a great knowledge of all the romantic heroines in all kinds of written material, including the celebrity-studded magazines. As her husband snores away, she reads in bed, craving for the company of someone else.
The detached activist. As we are experiencing the fourth (or is it the sixth?) wave of Feminism, there are some “archaic” attitudes that don’t disappear. This lady has an aggressive attitude against all the vestiges of the patriarchal society, including the supposedly degradingly démodé habitude of courtship. Listening to their inflamed rhetoric, you can’t fail to have the impression that if a man she likes dares to offer her a bunch of flowers she would melt.
Before leaving my office, Veronica X. maliciously turned the tables on me.
-“Doctor, with your knowledge of women, how come you’re still alone?”
What do you want me to say? Precisely. The more you know about them…
What do you think? Please tell us.
Don’t leave me alone.